It has been all over my Facebook for the past month. I heard it again in my classroom coming from my students' mouths. People complaining about others who are decorating too early for Christmas. I'm sorry what? You're making a big deal about people getting excited about Christmas? Are you hearing yourself? Let's find something else to be angry about please. Who is it hurting if someone puts their tree up in November, October or even July? Is it hurting you? Are they breaking into your house and putting up Christmas trees? Does it hurt you if someone wants to celebrate their favorite time of the year a little earlier than you do? No. It doesn't. So stop complaining about it and stop telling your children it is something to complain about and look down on others for.
We've talked for years in the educational setting about accepting others and accepting differences. We've preached to kids for at least the last 20+ years that I've been teaching to treat others with kindness. Teachers have been telling students/kids that everyone is different, everyone has different beliefs and everyone has different backgrounds and that is okay. We have had skits, role plays, speakers, videos, books, poems, you name it to try to get the message across to stop bullying. So why in the name of heaven do we have adults who just never seem to have gotten this message? Were you not listening in class? Are they the same adults who wouldn't buy a 1/3 lb burger because they thought it was less meat than the 1/4 lb one on the other menu? Are these are the same adults who think Agrabah is a city in the Middle East and have never heard of Azerbaijan? Are these the same adults who think schools are putting litter boxes in the bathrooms?
Where am going with this rant? I'm probably just venting because the people who need to get my message are either
A. Never going to read this blog OR
B. Never going to change their mind even if they do but...
My message is this - next time you start to judge someone for their personal life choices ask yourself this question, who's it hurting? My newsfeed is full of judgmental memes from people who think it is okay to mock or worse, be angry, that someone chooses a lifestyle that they disagree with. They have a problem with literally every choice that isn't conformist. They find issue with gays, lesbians, bi sexual, non binary, transgender and don't even get them started on furries. Christmas trees in November are just the tip of the iceberg. But I want to ask them, who's it hurting? How does it hurt you if someone finds happiness with someone of their own gender? How does it hurt you if someone decides they would rather be a different gender? How does it hurt you if someone wants a tattoo, a piercing or wants to wear a tail? If you don't get it why someone would want to, if you don't understand their life choices, I can get behind that. But the truth is - and yes I'm yelling here - YOU DON'T HAVE TO.
You don't have to put your Christmas tree up because someone on Facebook does. You don't have to be gay just because your neighbor is. You don't have to dress as a furry just because your friend's brother's cousin does. You don't have to switch your gender because your son's teacher did. You don't have to even "get it". You just have to stop judging others, mocking others, and trying to force your lifestyle choices on them. I guarantee you they aren't asking you to conform to their choices. They don't want you to and they aren't ever going to try to convince you to either. Chances are that as much as you don't understand their life choices, there are probably plenty that you make that they don't understand either. They aren't asking you to even understand. They are simply asking you to keep your mouth shut and your hands off your keyboard about their choices.
So instead of believing that schools are putting litter boxes in bathrooms and spouting that nonsense on social media, spend 5 minutes talking to your child about acceptance and tolerance. Maybe some of it will sink into you as well. It may take time to change your brain, change your thought process, change your behavior - but it is worth it in the long run. Once you stop worrying about how everyone else is finding their happiness you can focus on your own. Kindness is never the wrong choice.
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